August Recs | Invincible Parents + Got a Question?
Yet, it’s good that I am limited, because it points both myself and my children to the Limitless One.
Brittany Allen | Treasuring Christ
Friends,
If you read about how creation seems to have taken up arms against me, then you probably won’t be surprised to know that after eight years living in the same house, this is the summer we discovered we have a mouse. Oh yes, I have the droppings in my laundry room to prove it. One thing about me is I really, really, really think mice are adorable. Like, the cutest little things. But I also really, really, really don’t want them in my home. Please leave, mouse, I don’t want to have to kill you. We did kill him. Poor Freddie. Well, technically my husband killed him and very wisely took out the trash before I could see for myself.
“Was he cute? Was he a little guy?”
“I’m not telling you anything about it,” he said. You know what else he said?
The other day as we meandered to the backyard after our family walk, I hear, in the most calm, unbothered voice, “I just got stung by a yellow-jacket.” No yelp, no “ouch!”, just a simple sentence said in such a way you’d think he was telling me he got the oil changed in our car. This is a stark contrast to me, who, by the way, is typing this with a half-swollen hand. Why? Because I had the audacity to prune a yellowing branch from my tomato plant, not knowing a bumble bee was (unluckily) right in the exact spot I stuck my hand.
Her fuzzy butt fell to the ground and proceeded to walk away like, “She’s crazy! She tried to kill me!” She then sat on my hose recovering from the absolute *trauma* of it all. My husband said he would have stomped her, but another thing about me is I love bees. Wasps? KILL THEM WITH FIRE. But save the bees! So, instead, I spent the next thirty minutes reminding my three-year-old not to step on her and kneeling down to see if she was okay, until she finally crawled into the grass.
In case you were wondering, small children do not care if you get stung and your hand swells up so big that you only have one giant knuckle where there used to be four. The snacks must go on! (I did get out of cooking dinner and doing dishes though so, actually, thanks bee!)
That reminds me, one time I stubbed multiple toes on the doorway and fell down, holding my foot and rocking while I groaned in pain. My oldest was watching Bluey and occasionally looked over at me like “what is wrong with you? I’m trying to watch a show here, mommy.” Did I mention he also giggled in excitement when I got stung? Both times. Kids do not care. I think it’s partially because they’re still learning empathy, but maybe it’s more than that? Maybe it simply goes against what they’ve grown up believing—that mommy and daddy are their safe place, their steady hand. No matter what, mommy and daddy will be there.
One day, my husband was reading a children’s book to our son where one of the pictures showed a little girl using a walker. He pointed and exclaimed, “Mommy!” You see, when I gave birth to his little brother, I suffered nerve damage that rendered me unable to walk for weeks. The only way I could get around the house was by crawling or using a walker. He never commented on it at the time, but he remembers. It made an impression on his little mind.
It’s hard for children to learn that mommies and daddies aren’t as invincible as they thought. That a bee sting can make us unable to use our right hand or an epidural paired with back problems can steal away your ability to take care of your children. It’s humbling for me, too. I want to be an invincible parent. I desire to not let anything phase me in my endeavor to raise my kids—no sorrow, no pain, no anxiety, or sickness.
Yet, it’s good that I am limited, because it points both myself and my children to the Limitless One. It puts us all in a place of reliance on God, and that’s a gracious thing. If I never struggled as a parent, would my children look to something better? If I never failed them, would they ever see their need for their unfailing Heavenly Father? If I was a perfect mother, would I go to God for help? Would I see my need for my perfect Savior?
If you’re a parent and wrestling with your weaknesses today, I hope you’ll be encouraged that more than our children need a perfect mother or father, they need to see Jesus. More than you and I need to be perfect, we need to revel in the perfection of Christ.
I wanna learn about you!
If you feel comfortable sharing, would you take a sec to answer this poll? Thanks!
These words though:
“Nevertheless, any who have truly lived and loved must come to believe that lament is at least part of our existence. Only the idealistic and unloving belittle tears and sadness. Only the coolly detached never raise a complaint about the condition of things, including our broken bodies. If we never lament, then it is legitimate to wonder if we have ever truly loved.” — Kelly M. Kapic, Embodied Hope
Got a question about something? Whether it’s about theology, gardening, flowers, motherhood, writing, miscarriage, marriage, chronic illness, or anything in between, I’d love to answer one or two in my next newsletter. Just click on the button below and shoot me a message.
Recent Articles + Poems:
Sonshine on my Substack
The Boundary Lines of My Broken Body on Calla Press
Gifts Forged in Grief on the blog
Warring with All of Creation on the blog
From the Archives:
What Our Struggle to Love Someone Else Reveals About Us on the blog
Books I Finished:
*Bit of a disclaimer: I love to share what I'm reading with you guys, but please don't take that as an endorsement of every word written in every book I share.
Birds of a Feather by Jacqueline Winspear
A Question of Honor by Charles Todd
Freeing Your Child from Anxiety by Tamar Chansky
A Good Man is Hard to Find (Short Story) by Flannery O’Conner
How to Break Up with Your Phone by Catherine Price
Murder at Blackburn Hall by Sara Rosett
Current Reads:
You might notice some of these have been on here a while. Mothering two little boys and writing a book has significantly decreased my time to sit down and read. It's a season. I'm embracing it and look forward to being able to read more again soon.
Embodied Hope by Kelly M. Kapic
The Overnight Guest by Heather Gudenkauf
Counterfeit Kingdom by Holly Pivec
The Wolf in Their Pockets by Chris Martin
God is Still Good by Katie Faris
The Soul in Paraphrase by Leland Ryken
Into His Presence by Tim Chester
Blessed by Nancy Guthrie
The Son of David by Nancy Guthrie
Hey, Here's What I Recommend:
Book: Okay, full disclosure: I haven’t finished this one yet. But it has been so good so far. Such rich encouragement for sufferers. Check out Embodied Hope by Kelly M. Kapic
Song: Belly of a Whale by Taylor Leonhardt
Articles, Poems, and Essays I Liked:
We are Afraid by Rachel Joy Welcher
My Summer Child by Rachel Joy Welcher
The Marriage Garden by Lara d’Entremont
For Funsies:
- My three-year-old loves this book, and so do I! Such rich truths and the pictures are beautiful. (Affiliate link)
- Speaking of books, my friend Abbey Wedgeworth sent over two of her children’s books from her Training Young Hearts series and they are such a good tool for helping little ones learn how to treat others. Pretty handy in my life right now with a three-year-old and a one-year-old!
- We’ve been grilling this summer and here’s one of my favorite meals: My husband grills up marinated chicken thighs and a mix of zucchini, onion, and mushrooms. I make rice and we eat it all in bowls with yum-yum sauce. It’s basically low-key hibachi.
- That leads to my favorite marinade which you can use for chicken, pork, or steak (No measurements because I just go with my gut):
Soy Sauce (Can sub coconut aminos but be sure to add salt and omit the brown sugar)
Olive or vegetable Oil
Minced garlic (lots of it)
Brown Sugar (not too much, just want a hint of sweetness)
A Dash of Apple Cider Vinegar
A few grinds of fresh pepper
(You’re welcome)
Can’t stop, won’t stop with the cut-flower garden! At this point I’m making 2-3 bouquets a week and it’s literally the best. I have a couple dahlias that made it and will hopefully bloom soon. I also sowed some more sunflower seeds as well as snapdragons. Hoping they’ll do well.
The boys are both growing way too fast as usual. Theo will be 4 next month and I can’t believe it. He’s in such a loving, sweet phase after a rough couple years. Soaking up his snuggles and giggles. William is about as adorable as a one-year-old can be. He mostly just walks around pointing as things and declaring, “Yeah!”
Behold, a miracle. This zucchini plant is a branch from the very same plant in which the vine-borer massacre took place. In an effort to save my plant I was digging larvae out and accidentally severed it from the roots. I proceeded to find and kill every nasty caterpillar in a rage. One untouched branch remained. I stuck that rootless thing in the dirt and hoped for the best. Guys, IT SURVIVED. It grew new roots and is thriving now. Gardening is wild. God’s creation is so cool.
Our marriage is 10 years old! Our boys were sick so our family staycation and our date got obliterated, but we were together. And I’m thankful to spend every day by his side. I like him, like, a lot.
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May you treasure Christ ever more. <3
Brittany Lee
I'm interested in what you thought of Birds of a Feather. I loved the first Maisy Dobbs book, but this one seemed to be leaning in a weird place spiritually speaking. I haven't read the theod one yet to know of it was just a blip or a direction.